The Definitive Guide on Saving Your Marriage

If you are currently married but are having lots of issues within your marriage, then you’re probably thinking about saving your marriage. There are many reasons why you may have problems in your marriage and in most cases, the majority of issues occur over a significant period of time. The truth is, no marriage ends overnight and there were probably lots of little problems that caused it to deteriorate over time. However, this doesn’t mean that you can’t fix your marriage since you definitely can once both you and your spouse are committed to doing so.

 

The first thing you should do is identify the major issues in your marriage.

Forget focusing on the little stuff right now. That can easily be worked out later as you become better at problem solving together.

 

Many couples get confused since there are probably lots of issues and neither party knows where to start. So, you should both take some time to think about your marriage and create lists separately of the biggest issues you each have. It is important that you do this activity separately for the best result. Once you have both listed out your issues from the most important to the least, then you can discuss both of your lists together.

 

You may be tempted to get defensive or argumentative during this process, however, do your best to avoid being so. After all, you are here to solve issues and not just get into a heated argument that goes nowhere and solves nothing. Some couples are able to discipline themselves to do this, but many don’t seem able to do so.

 

Once the discussion has begun, both of you should talk about possible solutions to each problem, starting with the biggest problems. If the biggest problems are too difficult to start with, then start with a slightly easier one to get the ball rolling.

 

In the event you are at fault for a particular problem or didn’t know it was one, it is urgent that you take a more active part in coming up with solutions. For example, if your partner is unhappy because you don’t spend enough time with them, then the obvious solution is to think about ways you can re-shuffle your schedule so you can make more time for them. The fact is that no one should be too busy for their wife or husband and the relationship will only thrive as you do so.

 

In addition to fixing actual problems in your marriage, it is vital to do things to repair the intimacy and love between the two of you. This can be done by increasing physical contact and being more affectionate and loving. It can also mean spicing things up in the bedroom and doing romantic things for your partner. You should also try to be more thoughtful and surprise your wife or husband in ways they wouldn’t expect.

 

In closing, a marriage is supposed to last a lifetime and I encourage you to make every effort to save your marriage. No one gets married to get divorced. Also, if you have children together, you are stuck together for life with all the upcoming celebrations of holidays, birthdays, graduations, weddings, etc.  They will all be so much more enjoyable for both of you and your children as they see you work things out. You will be modeling that relationships can be repaired.

 

Keep in mind that if things are too hot to handle between you right now a good

Marriage friendly marriage counselor, therapist or coach can be that third party who helps you gain a new perspective you may not be able to reach on your own.

 

When you begin again to nurture your love for each other, those loving feelings will usually return in time. Unless you make efforts to do so, you will always wonder if you could have repaired things between you. So, keep the above tips in mind and I am sure, your relationship will improve.