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Is My Marriage Worth Saving and How Do I Save It? - Marriage Counseling Online, Life Coach & Relationship Workshops - Waverly J. Hanson, MA

Is My Marriage Worth Saving and How Do I Save It?

is-my-marriage-worth-saving-and-how-do-i-save-itIf your spouse is talking about divorce or if you are considering a separation, you should take some time and think over the following:

It is possible to fix a relationship and rebuild a marriage, but you might be asking yourself this question: ‘Is my marriage worth saving?’

The Answer Is Yes

Almost all marriages are worth saving. You have spent years together, shared many experiences and maybe had children together. Things might seem bleak at the moment and you might not think that you can ever be happy again with your spouse. However, your marriage is worth saving and you can rebuild things if this is what you set your mind to do.

Are You Ready To Fix Your Marriage?

The real question is not ‘Is my marriage worth saving?’ but ‘Do we have what it takes to fix things?’ The truth is that fixing a marriage is not easy. This is something you will have to work on for a while. You will never have a good relationship unless you make efforts on a daily basis.

What Does It Take To Save A Marriage?

Saving a marriage requires a lot of time and effort. Anything important requires the same. You and your spouse may need to learn again how to best talk and listen to each other. You may also need to figure out why your marriage is no longer enjoyable. At the same time detecting what needs to be done so that both spouses find happiness and contentment in the marriage. Additionally, you will need to examine how you have slipped into some negative habits and make honest efforts to become a better and happier person so you can both bring more to the marriage.

Why Should You Stay Together?

When you take some time for yourself and encourage your spouse to do the same, you may be reminded of the many wonderful traits of one other that you enjoyed in the past. As you focus on those things it will remind you of reasons to stay together. Your children should be an important reason, but you should also try to think about everything the marriage has brought you over the years.

Are You Willing To Try?

Fixing a marriage takes time and effort. Ask yourself if you are really willing to make the effort work on your marriage and on yourself. You cannot expect to be successful and to rebuild your marriage if you are not fully committed to making things better. It helps also if your spouse is committed to trying.  However, keep in mind it is a myth that both people have to go for help for it to make any difference.

At times, after getting into a massive argument with your spouse or hearing that they want a divorce, it can be helpful to take some time out to calm down before resuming your conversation.

Consider scheduling an appointment with a ‘marriage friendly’ marriage counselor, coach or with a therapist so you can practice some new and improved ways to really communicate with each other. It’s very likely you will be able to gain a clearer view of what is really happening between you. At the same time, having an outside experienced person assist you will gain help on ways to fix your marriage.

It is true that you could also seek help from friends if you know a couple who has gone through the same things or something similar.  However, it is important to use caution with this as others knowing your personal business can cause further problems, due to getting bad advice or taking sides, etc.