Strong Marriages Don’t Happen Automatically
This is not something that you automatically acquire once you meet the right person. This is a skill that you build over the years by working on your marriage. Marriage is a commitment and you should be ready to be the best person you can be and to build a family with your spouse when you make this commitment. You need to make a conscious choice to actively work on building the kind of relationship that will make you and your spouse happy.
A lot of marriages fail because people become complacent about working on their marriage or never realized that a strong marriage is something that you build over the years. You probably know a few couples who have lived together for years but who do not seem to have anything in common or who don’t particularly enjoy each other’s company. This might even be your case.
It Is Not Too Late To Start Now
The good news is that it is not too late to improve your marriage. You can start working on your relationship and build a happy marriage even if you have become complacent about the relationship or if you are considering divorce because you and your spouse are not happy with the marriage. If you feel that your marriage is not in good shape, you need to have a talk with your spouse and try to figure out together what can be done if they are willing.
If you two are still able to communicate with one another. Focus on the positive and make a list of the things that you have in common. These would be your children, the home you have created and other goals you have reached together. These can be assets and proofs that your marriage is worth investing time and energy into.
Suggestions That Can Help
Hopefully you two are able to communicate warmly and respectfully and to meet one another’s emotional needs. Your spouse should in return be able to meet your expectations and emotional needs as well. Many couples become disconnected from each other because they are not even aware of the other’s needs or simply do not know how to meet these expectations. There are simple things like paying attention to each other, sharing some fun activities and just sitting down for a chat on a daily basis will make a difference.
Personal growth is another thing you might have to work on. You can keep your relationship interesting if you seek fulfillment outside of your marriage, either in your work or in another activity. It is important to have a healthy social life outside of your marriage and to develop your own interests and activities. You will have more to share with your spouse and will be able to bring more to the relationship if you are able to grow as a person.
Adopting these healthy habits as early as possible is important. It is not too late to change things even if you have been married for a while but you need to want to change and to agree with your spouse on how you will start working on your marriage.
If you find it difficult to do these things on your own, don’t hesitate to get professional help. A skilled marriage counselor, coach or therapist can usually get you on a positive track quickly.
Check out my best seller How to Divorce-Proof Your Marriage: Stop Marriage Pain, Start Reconnecting! If you want to consider some help, see my 1 Minute Marriage/Relationship Quiz on my website or write me with your questions or suggestions on what has worked for you. http://HowToDivorceProofYourMarriage.com Please write me at [email protected]